Basket Case: AHHHHH AHHHHH AAAHHHHHHH

This one is a real oldie. Basket Case was released way back in 1982, and it still holds up, even today. What can be said about this glorious movie, whose every line was so perfectly acted, so well-conceived that calling it an Oscar snub doesn’t even do it justice. It should have won for best picture, best actor, and every other award. Wait, what? Gandhi won best picture that year, you say? Who has even SEEN that movie? Honestly, no one in the last 20 years has watched Gandhi and it never even spawned a sequel. Basket Case has 2! Each one was terrible, but still!

I’ll leave it to IMDB to describe the plot of this one: “A young man carrying a big basket that contains his extremely deformed Siamese-twin brother seeks vengeance on the doctors who separated them against their will.” That encapsulates it perfectly. He hides his deformed brother in a basket at a hotel as he goes about exacting revenge. It’s so brilliantly thought out, you don’t even need to ask questions. Of course he would want revenge! The assholes tried to kill his brother by separating him and tossing him in the dumpster! Sigh, what monsters….

I barely need to mention the director’s name, but if I did, it would hook you instantly. Frank Henenlotter—he of the Brain Damage, Bad Biology, and Frankenhooker fame—expertly mixes in poignant dialogue with top notch visual effects to make something both harrowing and comical. I swear it couldn’t look any more real when Belial, the deformed brother, mutilates his persecutors, as he flies across the air effortlessly but with such grace, making you truly BELIEVE in his cause. You feel his pain as he tries to decide whether these people are actually worth killing, then kills them anyway. I can’t possibly ruin the finale, but it’s as unsettling and affecting as anything you’ll see in modern cinema (except maybe that last scene in the Avengers: Infinity War, boy that was a shocker).

Everyone should see this movie at least once in their lifetime. It’s an epic, monumental achievement in filmmaking, something so grand that 2 sequels couldn’t contain the sheer genius of the first. It’s a heartbreaking ode to Siamese twins, but also as capable of sending chills down your spine as movies like Rosemary’s Baby and The Exorcist did in the 70s. So, if you’re sitting around the house and you’re spending 30 minutes perusing Netflix for something to watch because you’ve already binged Breaking Bad and The Good Place, go find a comfortable couch, pop some corn, and watch Basket Case (but not Basket Case 2 or 3, ew).